Archive for the ‘enlightenment’ Category

My “First” Enlightenment

August 30, 2010

Many, many years ago…

So long ago it seems as if it is a past life. So many chapters in my life have been read, re-read, read again and forgotten. This is one of those chapters in my life that I forgot existed. You might expect that the moment of one’s enlightenment would be never forgotten, but remembering such a moment is contrary that moment’s essence, and its life is lost in the annals of a memory replayed over and over. I had never re-read this chapter in my life (like I have so many others), but I stumbled upon it this morning while doing some preliminary plastering on my home’s exterior.

And so it begins –

I find myself sitting at the feet of a nameless master. But wait, I must step back a bit to explain how I got here.

I have always sought the most serious answers to life’s puzzling questions – serious answers to this joke we call life, and so, before entering college I decided to go to India to seek out those who knew. I travelled the countryside for months. I had meditated and sat satsang with yogis, sages and fakirs. I had seen it all, and yet still had not found what I was looking for.

I spent weeks at an Ashram waiting for Sai Baba to appear, hopeful that this God could answer my questions. When he arrived, I was granted private audience with him. While he explained to me that he was not the one for me, he said the One was calling and that I must go back on the road. I must continue my journey. Before I left, and in the typical nature of wise ones, Sai Baba muttered something so cryptic (I was rather young and naive) to me that had me wondering as I walked out the door, “Is this God bisexual?” This, in and of itself held no import to me whatsoever, as I had met bisexual Gods before, I just never quite understood them. Gods and men all have choices to make, and it is far from me to judge another. I later learned that this God has controversy follow him like flies follow un-showered Frenchmen (of which there are many – flies and un-showered Frenchmen).

I encountered Babaji some weeks later, and he, too, said he was not the one. I had to ask him in reply, “If all are one, how can you  not be the one?”

He smiled some cryptic smile as his sparkling eyes bored deep into my soul and I ended up with the biggest headache I ever had. He told me to go to the Ganges and bath so I would be clean for my meeting with the one True One. I went to the Ganges, high in the foothills of northern India, and bathed in the holiest of earthy waters. I ended up with dysentery.

After this, I continued on my journey, asking many where I might find the one. People would say, “Ahhh, you seek the Silent One! Continue on your path, young man – he awaits you.”

Weeks had passed as the blisters on my feet grew into slathering, oozing , puss-filled monstrosities fusing with the cotton fibers of my socks. Weeks of doubts, wishes to be elsewhere, hunger I had never known, and sights to behold unfolded before me. I knew I would soon be dead if I could not find the One.

One morning I entered a small village ready to give up on my dreams of understanding all there was to be understood. I asked an old man about the One. He pointed. There was a door. I went through the door. My eyes fell upon a not so unusual sight of a man in robes meditating on a cushion. Could this be the One I sought? Could this be the One that awaited me – that One who knew I was coming to see him? I sat down silently before him and waited.

Silence.

Hours pass – he begins to snore.

More hours pass – he stirs.

A little movement under the folds of cloth that covered this wise one, and some low moaning begins. Chanting, or maybe only the response of one whose legs are stiff from having not moved from the typically uncomfortable full-lotus position?

I could take it no longer, and so I spoke as this moaning (chanting?) continued getting louder. I asked expectantly and abruptly, “Are you the One I seek?”

His reply?

“Shhhh…. I am Master Bei Ting.”

I knew I had found the One.

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Contradict Yourself One Last Time

April 22, 2010

How do you see yourself?

Nothing in or about this world can limit us or lessen us in our greatness (not capacity for) or our ability to exist simultaneously in multiple dimensions, for, as I have said before, we do consistently and always exist in a much larger and complex reality whether we realize it, acknowledge it or care for it. Ignorance can feign bliss.

It is our folly to think ourselves small.

It is our response to being in this world that can be a yoke restraining certain understanding, for we become fascinated with it — we are mesmerized and hypnotized by the glamours that surround us in this matrix that we ourselves design and perceive.

We fall for the limited information that is provided by our physical senses in this physical world as if there is no other source of information. We limit ourselves by believing the picture we see is the whole of reality. We don’t believe the images and stories shown in movies are the whole of reality, but the movie that continues in our own lives has got to be it.

The END…

We have become lazy and apathetic because what our five senses provide us with is so easy to grasp — it is all so accessible.

Our subtler senses, however, are elusive in comparison, so we generally can’t be bothered with them or with interpreting the information they provide. We thrill ourselves with the occasional peripheral activity caught by our eye, or the synchronicity of a phone call from someone we just thought of. Well — welcome to nursery school.

Meanwhile, our subtler and more refined senses continue to function without our attention, and they continue to provide us with valuable information that we could not survive without. Behind the scenes are forces and players conducting things with our participation in our higher states, while we go stumbling along in our condensed realities. All this we choose to ignore, and essentially now take completely for granted. Our hearts continue to beat without any effort on our part, but when it stops, we do pay attention.

We shortchange ourselves and then wonder why such feelings of incompleteness and sorrow continue to creep into our lives.

We could have it another way….

We could be more spontaneous and playful with ourselves, and less reflexive and reactive to others and the events that life presents us.

We could be more innocent and childlike and respond to things more simply and honestly.

We could be a little more graceful, and less selfish.

We could contradict ourselves one last time.

Honesty – the Better Part of Valor?

April 1, 2010

I must be totally honest with you and say one thing to begin — This world bores me, but, an explanation is in order.

I receive no satisfaction from the excessive hype of conspicuous consumerism, profit-margins or portfolios in Bull Markets, but please read on. Product propaganda and branding, branding, branding is designed to convince me that I am lacking, and it tells me that it will  alleviate  my emptiness  and anxiety  if I go shopping — this confuses me. Television has no purpose in my life, for it is a tool of fear-mongering fools using incessant drivel and subtle thought-manipulation that would guide me in my life and the choices I would make. This insipid message that would be continually pumped into my brain would tell me how to think, feel and live my life.

I have divorced myself from this world and have no time for its continued conditioning. With the little I have given up, the little that there was to release was no real sacrifice for me to make, and I have been filled with a substance that is much more than even the word love could describe.

It can be said:

Before enlightenment — chop wood, haul water.

After enlightenment — chop water, haul wood.

I hope you have decided to follow me this far, because today I have reached out for something more. I see beauty all around me. I see this beauty in nature, in people, and now, yes, even in shopping malls, bulls and bears. I devote myself to joy and all that is in my life. I take joy in my hammer, compass and square (no, I am not a Free-mason, I am a Free-carpenter). I go shopping without knowing what to buy, for no one has told me what to buy. I acquire things as they come to me without the need to acquire. Things fill no empty spaces within me, for things cannot do this. These spaces are filled with purpose of existence and experience now.

I seek no thrill in any rhetoric, be it other’s or my own. I am content with creation in all its expressions and variation. All things are equally beautiful, and it is from these things that I choose. The world is still a place of excess, but it is now a place of excessive beauty since I have turned my back on things that seem contrary.

I now smile at those I see and smiles shine back at me. I know no one around me, and yet they know me. Stories about me surround me and yet I hear them not. Wonder never ceases to amaze me, and I allow myself to know nothing so that I can continue to wonder.

All this I aspire to.

So… , I must now be totally honest with myself and say one thing to finish — This world no longer bores me, for I have reached into a place (and continue to do so) that is different than what I have known before. I have reached into this place, and each time I bring a little bit of it back into our ordinary world. By doing so, this ordinary world changes for me. There is no explanation for this strange conversion and it is not a matter of enlightenment, satori or nirvana. It is simply that there is a key in all I see, and a secret always waiting to be revealed. It is a peeling away of the layers of an onion.

I will say it again — This world no longer bores me.

Deception and the Beauty Within

January 24, 2010

 

how things can be hidden 

Recently I stumbled across an interesting forum discussion where I decided to get involved. It didn’t take long before someone confronted me with some typical rhetoric of “a beautiful world” and that we must deny the “ugliness that so often tempts us, and draws us away from God.” It was said that I must have some serious demons within me that I must deal with, and that I must seek peace to heal myself, something that is “so obviously needed.” Some comments about Tolle’s pain-body followed.

I am sure that I do have “demons within me”, and am thankful for this, for in the typical dualized-thought that is so popular in this world, I could not deny this. What I deny is any wickedness or evil within this quality. I say again and again, this aspect of ourselves cannot be denied if we wish to be whole, remember who we are, and reclaim what is ours.

Apparently, I dwell upon deception a bit too much for some who want to see a “la-de-da, isn’t this a beautiful world” reality. For me, this is outright denial of the gift of the Adversarial Quality that our One-Consciousness continually offers us so that we can see the beauty in life – not by denial, but by clarity.

Deception is not ugly, but it is seasonal, and it does not exist independently in a real sense, for it always has to be laid over any given truth that it is designed to hide. It needs something within it, something to support it, and that something is truth. Deception paradoxically is a blanket, or layers of blankets laid upon our beds which keep us warm and secure in the winters of our lives. We choose to use these blankets. When the world becomes more harsh and the storms blow hard outside our homes, we like those blankets. As the winter passes, we peel these blankets off our beds, one-by-one until the sun reaches its peak in the sky. The truth lies under these layers of blankets just as we do when the winter settles in, and all nature goes to sleep. Things are eventually exposed in the clear light of summer days, and in the clear light of mind.

Failure to examine or admit the existence of these blankets in your life will have you never see the truth that lies beneath them. Cast them off, as is so easily done, and see the glittering prize beneath. See the way deceptions function, and when the following winters comes, you will not be controlled by them.

Our winter has come to an end – our spring is well-established and a new summer floats on the horizon of another new age. Everything is being brought to light for us all, and within us all – even if we fail to see this. All things exist to reveal truth, for life as we experience it is an evolving, symbolic metaphor.

 

lines reconnected


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